Staying home today: a rant

I wasn't planning on being at work today anyway, since we were supposed to be on a plane right now, so I'm taking a mental health day and avoiding anything work-related.

Watching the twin 125's. Oh excuse me, the Gatorade DUELS. WTF-ever, people. As far as I'm concerned it's still Winston Cup, and Nextel can shove their annoying walkie-talkie phone directly where the sun don't shine.

Here'a a rant: Why in HOLY HELL would you have one of these phones? What, you can't talk through the phone, you need to yell at it so that your private TMI-laced conversation is available for the ENTIRE WORLD to hear?

Let me 'splain. I encounter these "phones" mostly in two places: the hospital where I work and in stores. The hospital is especially troublesome. I don't want to hear about Granny's liver failure or junior's allergies, or how stupid the new doctor is, all in fantastic detail just because you can't be bothered to speak into a phone that you have to hold to your ear. They have hands free kits that you can actually speak normally into, you know. Why do you have a cell phone on in the hallway outside the various ICU's anyway? Go into the private family waiting area to make your calls. It's quieter there, as well.

And as far as stores are concerned, I don't need to hear that your sister's ass is too big for the size 8 pants she took in the dressing room, and can you please bring her the 10's....no, wait, the 12s. Maybe the 14s. I don't need to know that Johnny is going to buy video games before he meets you in the front or that the PIN number to Dad's cash card is 12345. God help you that there's no robber standing behind your daughter at the ATM when she uses the Nextel to get THAT particular bit of information.

I admit, I love my cell phone. I am attached to it, and I use it pretty often. However, I have learned that I don't need to yell in to it, and I know instinctively that certain topics are just not acceptable in public (don't tell your dad about your diarrhea on the bus, mm'kay?). Furthermore, I can actually hold the phone to my ear so that I don't treat everyone around me to a conversation about my personal business that they'd probably rather not hear.

A walkie-talkie has a place in a construction site, not a mall, and certainly not a hospital. Think about it this way, if your doctor can't tell perfect strangers about your sickness, why should you announce them to the universe via your "cell phone"?